17. Your mama mighta said that bullfrogs are dogs. But I’m here to tell you that I am a frog. Come and sit on my log you little pollywog. I find you absolutely ribbiting!" -Darryl, Kevin, and Andy on The Office [in their band during the song Bullfrog In Love]
16. "Penny: All right, try thinking about this -- Sheldon and Amy had sex.
Raj: Shut your a** " -Penny and Raj on The Big Bang Theory [self-explanatory. Raj was drunk]
15. "Punchy: Ted, I don’t know if I can marry her. Ted: Yes you do! You love her! Punchy: Ok thanks Ted!" -Punchy and Ted on How I Met Your Mother [Punchy worrying and Ted frustrated]
14. "Shhh! Not in front of Casey" -Ben on Better With You [after Maddie embarrassed Ben]
13. "Is she a friend of Ellen?" -Annie on Community [talking about Britta's "lesbian" friend]
12. "Now the truth is there's no such thing as a perfect moment, or a perfect spot. So forget about the balcony, Bartowski. All you need's the girl." -Casey on Chuck [After Chuck's proposal fell through]
11. "My middle name is Susan. So my name is Brittany S. Pierce. It sounds like Brittany Spierce. Brittany Spears" -Brittany on GLEE [On Brittany Spears week]
10. "We'll be on her like white on rice... which might sound racist because we're white and she, presumably, like rice." -Cam on Modern Family [after Lily bit another kid's finger]
9. "Amber, you know, I was two years in Viet Nam. Do you know what I thought about, what I dreamt about? Coming home, having a family, having grandkids. I dreamt you, Amber. And Haddie, and Drew, and Sydney and Max. We almost lost ya Amber. You've had some bad breaks. You're not feeling good about yourself. You didn't get into Berkeley? Well boo friggin who. You got to suck it up girl, you're a Braverman. You got my blood in your veins. If you ever do something like this again, if you even think of doing something like this again, I will kick your little butt all the way from here to the Golden Gate Bridge. You do not have my permission to mess with my dreams. Are we clear?" -Zeek on Parenthood [after Amber got in a car accident and almost died]
8. "Abed: It's the first season of Lost on DVD. Pierce: That's the meaning of Christmas? Abed: No it's a metaphor. It represents lack of payoff" -Abed and Pierce on Community [Claymation special]
7. "So James Woods murdered Stephanie, and then he murdered himself. Criss-cross." -Peter on Family Guy [after James Woods died on the show]
6. "This is gonna feel so good, getting this thing off my chest. That's what she said." -Michael on The Office [his final That's What She Said]
5. Buzz Aldrin: “Would you like to yell at the moon with me?” Liz Lemon: “Yes, I would.” [They face the moon] Buzz Aldrin: “I own you!” Liz Lemon: “You dumb moon!” Buzz Aldrin: “I walked on your face!” Liz Lemon: “Don’t you know it’s day? Idiot!” -Liz and Buzz Aldrin on 30 Rock [perfect]
4. "Steve: Ever make it to double pretzel in Pac-Man?" Danny: "Triple banana b****" -Steve and Danny on Hawaii Five-O [I love this]
T-3. (Tie): "Sure is a hard way to catch a mouse." -Grampa on The Simpsons [after a life-size game of Mouse Trap was set up.] "They own the world’s only all-giraffe basketball team, the New York Necks." -Jack on 30 Rock [Knicks, Necks, get it?]
2. "Tomorrow I can tell you what a great boss you turned out to be. Best boss I ever had." -Jim to Michael on The Office. [barely didn't cry]
1. "Zerts are what I call deserts, tray trays are what I call entrees, sandwiches are sammies, sandoozles or Adam Sandlers, air conditioners are cool blaterz with a "z" ... I don't know where that came from. I call cakes big ol' cookies, I call noodles long a** rice, fried chicken is fry fry chicky chick, chicken parmesan is chicky chicky parm parm, chicken caciatore is chicky catch, I call eggs pre-birds or future birds, root beer is super water, tortillas are bean blankets, and I call forks... food rakes!" -Tom on Parks and Recreation [you all knew it]
And now the TV season is almost over. Seems like just yesterday I saw the NBC Fall Preview. I love this group of shows, but many will be gone along with Michael Scott come next September.
