Enjoy this blog because what you read is of legendary status.

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

The Annual Survey: 2013 Edition

Oh, yes, oh, yes, oh, yes! It's time for the annual survey. What happened this year? Happy last post of 2013!



1. What did you do in 2013 that you've never done before?

I ate at Krusty Burger. I took trigonometry. Two very different experiences.

2. Did you keep your New Year's Resolutions?

I don't remember them.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

A cousin.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My grandfather, yes.

5. What countries did you visit?

The United States of America

6. What would you like to have in 2014, that you lacked in 2013?

I am content.

7. What date from 2013 will remain etched in your memory?

December 20. Fine day. Also, May 16. The Office

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

My first NaNoWriMo book I was proud of.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Please, I don't fail.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

I broke my foot.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Stephen Colbert's I Am America (and So Can You!)

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Jimmy Fallon, for sure.

13. Whose behavior made you depressed?

Miley Cyrus.

14. Where did most of your money go?

My bank account. Possibly Subway.

15. What did you get really, really excited about?

The Red Sox winning the World Series. Christmas. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.

16. What song will always remind you of 2013?

I Lived by OneRepublic. Shown in the promos for the end of The Office. Embedded into my brain.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

Happier or Sadder? Happier! Always happier. Always happy.
Thinner or Fatter? I don't even know. "Probz" thinner.
Richer or Poorer? Richer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Reading.

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Visits to the hospital.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

The usual. Had a Christmas Eve party with one side of the family, Fall River the next day with the other side. A celebration of extreme happiness.

21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?

I don't talk on the phone. I don't conversation.

22. Did you fall in love in 2013?

No.

23. How many one-night stands in the last year?

Zero.

24. What was your favorite TV program?

The Office, of course.

25. Do you hate anyone now, that you didn't this time last year?

Not really. JC Monahan possibly. Ray Lewis.

26. What was the best book you read?

Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. Good books upcoming, though.

27. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Michael Buble's past music.

28. What did you want and get?

Michael Scott returning to The Office for the finale.

29. What did you want and not get?

A Go On/Happy Endings renewal.

30. What were your favorite films of the year?

The Secret Life of Walter Mitty, Saving Mr. Banks, and This Is the End were all great.

31. What did you do on your birthday?

MexiCali Grill.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

I'd say it was satisfying. Bruins could have won the Stanley Cup, but I'm still happy for how far they made it and also, the Red Sox.

33. How would you describe your 2013 fashion concept?

Sweaters, polos, and cargo shorts.

34. What kept you sane?

Myself.

35. What celebrity did you like the most?

Honestly, either Jimmy Fallon or Adam Richman. Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak are up there.

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

The government shutdown is not the Purge.

37. Who did you miss?

Jason Mraz. That sixth album is coming soon, though.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

A friend named Caleb.

39. Tell us a valuable lesson you learned in 2013.

To live and value.

40. Is there a quote that sums up your year?

"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good, old days, before you've actually left them." - Andy Bernard

A Big Year for the Blog

This one is a bit longer than the sports montage. This encapsulates every big happening to the blog. For example, Jimmy Fallon, the Boston Red Sox, and The Office are included pretty heavily. Every important thing to happen to the blog is included.

My Favorite Moments of 2013

To countdown the best moments is to relive greatness.
  • Laying on my English teacher's floor, doing nothing, on the last day of school.
  • Standing in the cold air on Christmas Day night.
  • Going downstairs on Christmas Eve Eve to eat Pita chips, drink apple juice, and watch Late Night with Jimmy Fallon on the DVR.
  • Reading B.J. Novak's excerpt on The New Yorker.
  • Just watching Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.
  • Walking down Main Street U.S.A. in the snow with Happy Holidays by Andy Williams playing.
  • Laying on the couch and hearing the first piano keys play the intro to The Office's retrospective.
  • Andy Bernard singing I Will Remember You.
  • The opening scene of Saving Mr. Banks.
  • Everything about The Secret Life of Walter Mitty.
  • My first viewing of The Secret Life of Walter Mitty trailer.
  • The first scene of New Girl's season three.
  • Listening to comedy Pandora at night in Maine.
  • Watching the cars go by on my last night in Maine.
  • Early dismissal the Tuesday before Winter Break.
  • Sitting at the hotel table, looking out at Downtown Disney, drinking apple juice, as The Santa Clause 3 played in the background.
  • The time I went into Sleepy's.
  • Every time Shane Victorino hit the ball.
  • Red Sox win the World Series.
  • Every Boston sports comeback.
  • When my English teacher said she wanted to read my NaNoWriMo book.
  • Winning the fantasy basketball championship.
  • Lazy River at Six Flags.
A great, great year.

My Favorite Sports Illustrated Covers of 2013








My Favorite Sports by David Covers of 2013







My Favorite Commercials of 2013

I'm not going to rank these (heads up: the AT&T one is my favorite.) Yes, I'm including movie trailers.













My Favorite Tweets of 2013

I don't want to have rankings for any lists I don't have to. We can just celebrate the greatness that was 2013. Here are some of my favorite tweets from a great year for them.
























































My Favorite Songs of 2013

I'm not going to post the songs here because that would cause for a lot of frustration from readers. Instead, here they are. In no order, of course.

Cups by Anna Kendrick
Mirrors by Justin Timberlake
Chinese Food by Alison Gold
The Fox by Ylvis
Get Lucky by Daft Punk
Radioactive by Imagine Dragons
I Love It by Icona Pop
Suit and Tie by Justin Timberlake
Roar by Katy Perry
Underneath the Tree by Kelly Clarkson
Let It Go by Idina Menzel
Royals by Lorde
Daylight by Maroon 5
Love Somebody by Maroon 5
Clarity by Zedd
I Lived by OneRepublic

My Favorite Viral Videos of 2013

These are fun.











My Favorite Celebrities of 2013

The celebrities who made an impact this year. Obviously, Jason Mraz would be on my list of favorite celebrities, but he didn't quite do much in 2013. It's completely fine, but...I hope you get what I'm getting at.


  • Jennifer Lawrence
  • Paul Rudd
  • Aaron Paul
  • Ben Stiller
  • Amy Adams
  • Seth Rogen
  • James Franco
  • Steve Carell
  • Jimmy Fallon
  • Olivia Wilde
  • Mindy Kaling
  • BJ Novak
  • Ike Barinholtz
  • Patton Oswalt
  • Kristen Bell
  • Michael Bolton
  • Russell Crowe
  • Ryan Gosling
  • Taran Killam
  • Seth Meyers
  • Justin Timberlake
  • Adam Scott
  • Joel McHale
  • Colin Mochrie
  • Josh Gad
  • Josh Peck

My Favorite Television Shows of 2013

I will love television forever and ever and ever and ever. I narrowed it down to...thirteen. Wink.

13. Hawaii Five-O
12. The Amazing Race
11. How I Met Your Mother
10. Bob's Burgers
9. Community
8. Psych
7. Wilfred
6. 30 Rock
5. Brooklyn Nine-Nine
4. Parks and Recreation
3. The Mindy Project
2. New Girl
1. The Office

Obviously.


My Favorite Movie Posters of 2013

I've always had a soft spot for movie posters.
















My Favorite Movies of 2013

I think I can rank this one, but I'm only ranking the ones I've seen.

11. Identity Thief
10. The Heat
9. Grown Ups 2
8. Delivery Man
7. We're the Millers
6. Iron Man 3
5. The Hangover Part III
4. Monsters University
3. Saving Mr. Banks
2. This Is the End
1. The Secret Life of Walter Mitty

My Favorite Television Episodes of 2013

I should rank them, but why do that to myself?


  • Last Lunch (30 Rock)
  • Felina (Breaking Bad)
  • Ozymandias (Breaking Bad)
  • London, Baby (Parks and Recreation)
  • Parking Spot (New Girl)
  • Chicago (New Girl)
  • TinFinity (New Girl)
  • All In (New Girl)
  • Time Will Tell (Castle)
  • You've Got Sext (The Mindy Project)
  • Halloween (Brooklyn Nine-Nine)
  • Psych: The Musical (Psych)
  • Regrets (Wilfred)
  • Rhyme Scheme (How I Met Your Mother)
  • Honor Thy Father (Hawaii Five-O)
  • Moving On (The Office)
  • Paper Airplane (The Office)
  • Livin' the Dream (The Office)
  • A.A.R.M. (The Office)
  • Finale (The Office)

2013 in Sports

This is the latest installment of my annual montage creation. The year in sports. This year, the video was shorter than usual. It tends to be 9-16 minutes. It was 5 minutes and 57 seconds this time. Not as long, but I hope it's still quality.

The Montages of 2013

Every year, I am always sure to post the annual montages that are my favorite. This year, we have one extra montage that I'm sure will become a staple. We have the annual DJ Earworm mashup, the movie trailer montage, the TODAY show montage, the JibJab montage song, SportsCenter's montage, the YouTube rewind, Google Zeitgeist, and now we have Pop Danthology. Here we go!

DJ Earworm


Movie Trailer


TODAY
Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy


JibJab


SportsCenter


YouTube


Google


Pop Danthology


All awesome!

2013 in Lists from the Internet

Websites of course get in on the fun of reviewing the year. Here's some of my favorite lists.

Sports Illustrated's Top 10 Baseball Storylines of 2013
Sports Illustrated's Photos of the Year
Sports Illustrated's Best Sports Moments of the Year
Sports Illustrated's Top Stories of the Year
Grantland's Underappreciated 2013 Television
The Chive's Best News Bloopers of 2013
The Hollywood Reporter's 18 Breakout Stars of 2013
GQ's 25 Most Stylish Men of the Year
Entertainment Weekly's Top TV Stories of 2013
Entertainment Weekly's Best and Worst Episodes of 50 Shows
Entertainment Weekly's 17 Great Performances of 2013
Entertainment Weekly's 13 Lasting Images of 2013
Buzzfeed's Most Important Selfies of 2013
Buzzfeed's 24 Best Musical Moments on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon
Buzzfeed's Funniest Gifs of 2013
Buzzfeed's 70 Celebrity Babies of 2013
Buzzfeed's Defining Quotes of 2013
Buzzfeed's 45 Most Powerful Pictures of 2013
Buzzfeed's 50 Sexiest Ryan Gosling Things of 2013
Buzzfeed's 50 Best TV Quotes of 2013

Are You Ready for the Craziest New Year's Eve?

It's time for the annual post spectacular! Every year, December 31 is the day where I post the most. I always have more posts because I have lots of countdowns. Throughout the day I will be sharing with you lists of the best of 2013 from myself and others. There will be mashups, montages, and the best of 2013. I am not limiting myself to 13 lists of 13 different things. No, no. There will be as many lists as possible. Enjoy the spree!

A Very Merry It's a Wonderful Life Christmas

I told you a third quote from the best Christmas movie would come later. Here it is! Clarence's letter to George Bailey.

"Dear George: Remember no man is a failure who has friends. Thanks for the wings! Love, Clarence."

I think this was a great way to encompass the spirit of Christmas through Christmas specials throughout December's 31 days. I enjoyed re-living the best quotes of the Christmas season!

Monday, December 30, 2013

This Week's Sports by David


A Very Merry A Charlie Brown Christmas Christmas

The greatest Christmas special of all-time is Charlie Brown's.

"I never thought it was such a bad, little tree. It's not bad at all, really. Maybe it just needs a little love."

The Guest Anchor Phase

SportsCenter has entered a new phase. A phase where SportsCenter is no longer just anchored by ESPN alums such as John Anderson, Neil Everett, Stan Verrett, and Lindsay Czarniak. Now, guest anchors are stopping by in an influx. Ken Jeong was first. Then, Jimmie Johnson co-hosted after his sixth Sprint Cup title. Ron Burgundy was scheduled to host, but when a serious matter became a big headline, he was cancelled. Now, Barack Obama has apparently said that he too would like to host an episode of SportsCenter. It's become a star-studded affair.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 Trailer



I never saw the first 'Amazing Spider-Man' with Andrew Garfield, but I might have to so I can get caught up on what's going on in the second one. Mainly because B.J. Novak is going to star in the second, as well, but...yeah that's a pretty big reason. It hasn't been revealed who he's going to be, but it'll probably be an amazing role. Just saying. Unfortunately, he's not shown in the trailer. Rats.

The Swedish Chef v. Gordon Ramsay



A good, old-fashioned Food Truck Fight took place when Gordon Ramsay met the Muppets. This is a good video for good fun.

Sigh...Jacoby Ellsbury

Well, you've got your Roger Clemens. There's obviously Johnny Damon. Now, the new traitor to leave Boston for New York is Jacoby Ellsbury. Ellsbury was a free agent so he decided to sign a seven-year contract for $153 million dollars. Granted, you cannot turn down that money, but I'd be satisfied with say, $1.5 million dollars. That's all the money I'd need for my entire life. But athletes do have avarice from time to time. You can't fault Ellsbury for taking $153 million if someone offered it to him. You can fault him for choosing the Yankees of all teams. I am happy the Red Sox didn't pay that much for him because he is definitely not worth that much money. As soon as Scott Boras became his agent, he was gone. That much is true. Fare thee well, Ellsbury.

Sunday, December 29, 2013

A Very Merry Christmas Vacation Christmas

Ah, Christmas Vacation. Hilarious movie with its fair share of hilarious quotes.

Clark: "Since this is Aunt Bethany's 80th Christmas, I think she should lead us in the saying of grace."
Aunt Bethany: "What, dear?"
Nora: "Grace!"
Aunt Bethany: "Grace? She passed away thirty years ago."
Uncle Lewis: "They want you to say grace."
Aunt Bethany: "Hmm?"
Uncle Lewis: "The BLESSING!"
Aunt Bethany: "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic for which it stands. One nation, under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all."
Clark: "Amen."

The Revival of Hand-Drawn Animation



For Mickey's Very Merry Christmas, Disney brought back the classic 2D animation style for the advertisement for the event. It was amazing. I love this ad. It's classic. It has Mickey, Minnie, Donald, Goofy, and Pluto. And it happens on Main Street U.S.A. in the Magic Kingdom. Fantastic.

The All-Rhyme How I Met Your Mother

The final season of How I Met Your Mother,
has pulled out all the stops like the finale of none other.
Just recently in November,
surely you just must remember,
how the entire episode of the show rhymed 'til nearly December.
It started with Marshall on a bus,
as he told three stories to all of us.
That way little Marvin would fall asleep,
but our attention he would keep.
It was remarkably done, beautifully written,
and by the end I felt quite smitten.
My favorite story was Mosby at the Bat,
but definitely without question, I'll have to tip my hat,
to the others which were also great,
(and started right at 8:00).
The flow is reminiscent of a jaunty little ditty.
Sing the words of Barney Stinson, Player King of New York City.
Luckily, Time.com has posted a fine list,
of the best rhymes you can't count on one fist.
My favorite of the show,
happens to be here, right below.
"As Lisa said, 'I might like the spaghetti marinara,'
Poor Ted just wondered silently, 'Mariano Rivera?'
And as she said, 'I read this place has great chicken milano,'
All Ted could bring himself to think was 'Alfonso Soriano?'
If you want to see the rest,
Just click the link provided,
I know they did their best.

The Book of Tebow

Thomas Lake of Sports Illustrated has posted a hugely in-depth, almost PDF-like article about Tim Tebow, what he did, what went wrong, and where he'll be. It's a great read and purely fascinating. I've never seen an article like that. It's in somewhat chapter form, but it's also set up like a religious text. A very good read for Tebow aficionados. I bet he'll be back again one day. Check it here, if you wish.

Background Actors are Not the Best Actors

Buzzfeed has done it again. They posted a list of seventeen background actors who have no idea what they are supposed to be doing. It's pretty funny, especially considering that many are from household movies and television shows. My favorite is above, but there's plenty at the link.

Saturday, December 28, 2013

A Very Merry Elf Christmas

Probably my favorite non-humorous quote from Elf. You gotta love Elf. It's a new Christmas classic and an American institution! Words to live by:

"The best way to spread Christmas cheer, is singing loud for all to hear."

Bound 2.5 Side by Side



Kanye West and Kim Kardashian's new music video for Bound 2 was pretty weird and quite lame. Naturally, Seth Rogen and James Franco decided to create a parody of it. The best part? It's spot on! A side by side was provide-d so you can see the resemblance. Hilarious. This is life. This is my everything.

The Sad, Twisted Ballad of Brian Griffin

I don't care about spoilers here because Brian is alive again. Seth Macfarlane had been teasing that he would kill off one of the main members of the Family Guy family. I didn't think it would be my favorite character, Brian. I predicted Chris, but that was incorrect as you can see in the above picture. Brian died and for some reason stayed dead. Peter has been impaled before and thrown out of an exploding airport with his face ripped off, careening thousands of feet down into water. And he lives. Brian gets hit by a car and he unceremoniously dies. Whatever, Seth. But, later, Stewie finds a past version of himself, steals the time machine, abandons the new dog they got, and saves Brian. I guess it was just a ploy for some ratings because it hadn't even been a month. Alright.

Here's Brian alive and happy again (see why there was no spoiler alert?):


Delivery Man

It's not your average Vince Vaughn movie! I will forever stand by that statement. The charming tale about a man who ended up with over 530 children due to a mishap at the sperm bank and how over 120 of these children are now suing the bank to find out who he is. It was a very great film. There was one scene that actually made me smile on how uplifting it was. Plus, you can't go wrong with Chris Pratt.

Adam Richman: Lookin' Trim!

The Huffington Post, Buzzfeed, People, The Examiner. Everyone's talking about Adam Richman's amazing weight loss! He lost sixty pounds! It's amazing, he looks quite dapper now. He sure is ready to take the world by storm, which he's already done partway, but now he says he is feeling much better. Still loves food, though, which is awesome, as well!

Before:

After:

Friday, December 27, 2013

A Very Merry A Christmas Story Christmas

Ah, yes, the most descriptive line in all of A Christmas Story spoken by Jean Shepherd, the man with the great voice.

"We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice." - Ralphie as an adult

Let's Potato Chips

While watching, The Neighbors, my family and I noticed they were eating from a bag of Let's potato chips. We remembered the same chips are used frequently on Community. I Googled the chips and discovered that numerous television shows have used the same fake brand of chips in shots. It's incredible and mind-boggling. The article is here. Shows included are Community, The Neighbors, Orange is the New Black, Arrested Development, New Girl, The Middle, 2 Broke Girls, My Name is Earl, Ugly Betty, Switched at Birth, The New Adventures of Old Christine, Sons of Anarchy, and Cougar Town. There's even more, but too many to list and mention here. Bizarre, but cool!

Prince Fielder and Ian Kinsler are Prophetic

Recently, Ian Kinsler was traded by the Texas Rangers to the Detroit Tigers for Prince Fielder. It was a blockbuster trade that changed the landscape of both the American League Central and West. But, back in 2010, in an ad for Sunday Night Baseball (with Adam Scott, mind you) Fielder and Kinsler discussed big trades. It's like they predicted their own futures.

Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake...Again!

Fallon and Timberlake, one of television's newest bromances, has taken to the Saturday Night Live stage to host! This was Fallon's second time hosting and Timberlake's sixth. They were phenomenal. I loved every minute of it! Plus, it was the Christmas episode of SNL so that makes it even better. I won't post any sketches (they're not online), but here's the promo!




My New Favorite Website

This is a website called jewornotjew.com. It is every bit as amazing as it sounds. It takes random celebrities and tries to determine their Judaism background, without even considering their actual religion. For example, Jason Schwartzman's family history and roles were taken into consideration when deciding that Schwartzman is indeed a Borderline Jew, meaning he's an 11 on the "Jew Scale." I love it. Everyone from Count Chocula to Dwight Eisenhower is included and that's amazing.

Thursday, December 26, 2013

A Very Merry A Christmas Carol Christmas

Ah, the charming and wonderfully important tale of A Christmas Carol. It can never be done enough, but my favorite edition was Mickey's. Fun fact: I used to think Ebenezer was Scrooge's title up until this year, like President or Doctor or Mister. Apparently, it's his first name. Who knew? Here's a good quote to help everyone deal with going to post-Christmas time.

"I will honor Christmas in my heart and try to keep it all the year! I will live in the past, the present, and the future. The spirits of all three shall live strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach!" - Scrooge

Kyle Ayers Live-Tweets a Break-Up

Kyle Ayers was sitting on his roof when a couple nearby started arguing, not noticing him...at first. (That is addressed.) He decided to live-tweet the roof breakup, applying the hashtag, #roofbreakup. It was hilarious and thankfully Buzzfeed has immortalized the entire thing, if you wish to read it. Here's a sneak peek: